Fiona & Krispy Kremes

 

Meet Fiona. She is a baby hippo and she weighed about a hundred pounds. Why does that matter beside that she's just freakin' adorable? Because that is how much weight I have worked off! I have forgotten to weigh in the last two days, and I finally remembered today. My goal was to finally break below 250 lbs. I've been disappointed for the last two months on that and I have really been struggling with cravings and horrible food choices for the last month, so I was nervous about what my numbers were going to look like. But I did it! I worked off another 7.1 pounds this months, taking me to 245.5 pounds. Not only did I crush that 250 mark, FINALLY, but I also broke the 100 pounds worked off mark! I am now down 101.7 pounds, so when you find that cute baby Fiona with a dozen Krispy Kremes, you'll have found what I've gotten rid of. I can't believe I've made it this far, but I have about this much farther still to go.

I had honestly forgotten how close I was to that 100 pound mark because I have been so disappointed with my eating habits lately. I'll have two or three good days, and then I'm craving those Krispy Kremes, or ice cream, or Halloween candy, or cookies. Sugar in all forms has been rough for me, again. I had mostly kicked those cravings, but my weakened emotional state since Daddy died has really brought back the struggle for me, but it almost feels harder than it was the first time. Dan & DJ struggled a lot more with cravings than I did when we first got started, but I'm pretty sure these issues would have given theirs back then a run for their money. But in spite of the struggle, the change in my overall eating habits has still kept me in check and propelled me forward. For the first time I can remember, inertia has worked in my favor. I mean, the object at rest tends to stay at rest part and I have always been tight, but finally, being the object in motion that tends to stay in motion has kept my momentum going, despite the self-sabotage. Now, taking advantage of my optimism boost before it runs out, I'm going to work to use today's win to help myself get past those bad days a little easier!

Having come so far, looking back over where I've been, it's mind blowing. Today, DJ & I walked laps downtown near the courthouse where there are plenty of poke-stops and a set of about ten stairs. We go clockwise so I have to do a set of stairs every lap. Lately, I started running up the stairs every time. Today, DJ got the bright idea that we should turn around and run back down the stairs so we could run back up them again. Honestly, it was still pretty easy. We didn't double them up every time around, but we probably should. When we started this, I needed to use the rail for support to plod up the steps. There is a huge difference in my physical condition from where I started 13 months ago. I was wearing 4XL t-shirts. I'm now wearing a 2XL and I'm thinking it's about time to drop down to a straight XL. It  never occurred to me that I would ever get rid of those numbers in front of the XL, but now I'm wondering if I'll be stopping at a medium or a small... 

Such a change in my mental process. But here is what REALLY blows my mind. I had to buy some ring springs to resize my rings are they are getting too loose, including my wedding ring. It's a titanium ring so I won't be able to resize it. I may have to put it on a chain at a later date. The thing is though, as Dan pointed out, I bought this ring 17 years ago. It fit me then. Now it's too big? I've not been this size for 17 years?? Holy kamoley! The only bad thing about this morning was in trying to figure out how to reward myself for working off 100 pounds... I was all excited to order a new pair of jeans that are custom designed. DJ told me no. :( I mean, he WAS right when he said that I'll only be able to wear them for maybe six more months and then I'll just have to buy new jeans... but still... now I have to wait, what?  another year? year and a half? *sigh* He suggested a new pair of shoes, and I know just the pair! I have been wanting a new pair of high tops, but they have straps around the ankles. My ankles have been so big that I was afraid to buy them because the straps might not fit, but I was just showing Dan last night how nice my ankles have shaped up. New shoes have been ordered! I'll show them off later, once I have confirmed that they do, indeed, fit and the straps go around my ankles!

DJ also suggested that I could order my custom jeans after I work off my next 100 pounds. I had to disagree with that. In looking forward, I cannot guarantee that another 100 pounds is achievable. I fully believe I will get to a healthy point where I can maintain. I just don't know where that spot is yet. I mean, working off a total of two hundred pounds will put me at 147. I was in the best shape of my life my freshman year of college and I weighed about 150 pounds, so this may be a realistic goal. However, I've given birth and my hips have spread, and I'm a tad bit older. These things may come into account and affect what ends up being my maintenance weight. For now, my next goal is working off a total of 150. Once I've hit that, I'll go for 175. For sure, I want to be under 165 again, but beyond that? Who knows. If I get to 155 and can't seem to get under 150, I'm not gonna sweat it. If I sit there for a couple of months, living my best life, and my body refuses to drop any more weight, I'll take it. I'll figure out what my new size is and order those jeans. Until then, I'll keep moving forward and see where I end up.